how to survive vibbard

always plan to come in by 10:20; cause the clocks in the lounge are always set ahead.

dont watch movies in your room, and if you do,dont tell anyone about it.

dont let laura poop on your ID card.

its really hard to hide kittens in your room;so its better to just not do it.

lock your door while youre in your room. thisgives you time to hide the evidence before unlocking it.

dont write anything on the white boards.even if you think its not bad. someone else willget offended, and you'll spend your evenings(and early mornings) in j-board.

if someone keeps you from sleeping at night, promptlytell them that you will wake them up when you get up, if they continue to be loud late at night.that seems to work.

always have some tweezers in your room. incase you get locked IN.

dont ever say the phrase "making out" too loudly.save your three point fines for something really good,such as pranks. although, you may also get a j-board, which will be a waste of your time. so, maybe just be good.its easier to ask forgiveness than permission.

it doesnt matter if you write your name on it.someone else will eat it.

always sit in the doorway during dorm meetings. this way,if the meeting runs too long, you can easily slip out andgo to bed at a decent hour.

scarves are wonderful. just ask hannah.

no matter what anybody says, its ok to wear your towel fromthe bathroom to your room after a shower. if anyone tries to fight you on this, point your finger at them and yell "LESBIAN"really loudly. this should solve the problem.

dont rearrange your furniture too much. people start to notice.

rearrange your furniture all the time. it irritates people.

dont drink from the bubbler (water fountain). thats just dirty.

if they start bringing "Rent a Johns" on campus, just go home.

always keep some "Glade" in the bathroom. Just ask laura's suitemates.

if you ever forget your ID card when you get to lunch/dinner, andits the middle of winter, and she tries to tell you "im sorry,but i need you to go back and get your card". you should say,"im sorry, but i cant go back and get my card. its bloody cold out,and i am going to eat something right now." and walk right by.she has no right to handcuff you.

get a travel perm as often as possible.sleep as often as possible.even better, make a sign that says your sleeping, and hang it on your door, so that people think you are sleeping and go away when you want to be alone.

always give the Domino's guy a big tip. otherwise, youre a jerk.

if BBC says that CROCS are acceptable for dress code-approvedshoes, then there's no reason you cant wear flip flops.(at least, i wore them all the time.)

if you need to turn yourself in for breaking a rule, do it afteryou graduate. then, you still clear your conscience, while nothaving to get pointed or fined.

dont hang out on middle floor.bottom floor tends to get moldy.

you dont really need to vaccuum the stairs when you clean them.using a broom is so much easier, and no one can tell the difference.

stick a post-it note on your door everytime you actually do vaccuum your floor. this way, its less likely you will get a point for not having a Godly-looking floor.

skip all of the SLC and class chapels, and go to starbucks instead.